Little Monsters

I buy Opal and Dixie’s Glucosamine/Chondroitin/MSM supplements in bulk – 240 Joint Max or Synovi G3 chews in a tub. I make sure they get a chew a day because they’re short-legged, long-backed doggies and I want to ensure that their joints and connective tissues get the support they need. I always take out a small portion of chews and fill a jar that I leave in the pantry; I stash the bulk in a closet. WELL… last night I must have forgotten to fully close the closet door, and in the 20 or so minutes we were gone “someone” broke into the closet, tore into the stash and feasted -- I mean, really, really feasted -- on an early holiday extravaganza. We got home just as they were polishing off the remains. Alex managed to shoo them off with a loud “BAD GIRLS!” as they darted off, looking only minimally guilty, lips smacking and tails thumping happily a’ la “Weeee!”

No sooner did they run off did we turn around and NOOOOOOOOO! Puddles of gooey vomit everywhere!!!!!! Lakes Michigan and Erie right in our living room, spread over just about every corner of the room. At some point in the middle of the night I had to rush out, drive to the store to pick up rolls of paper towels and a package of Depends to line the floor with. They kept on barfing and barfing all through the night, so we made the girls sleep in a gated-off, floored area. Frankly, I’m not sure who had it worse – them, or me. I’m so used to curling up with them at night that I actually had a hard time sleeping. Not to mention that I wanted to make sure they didn’t get dehydrated so I kept running over to make sure their water bowls – all 1,000 of them, were filled with fresh water.

Today’s a cold, rainy day, and the two mischievous criminals are completely passed out. Occasionally they look up at me with these sad, sorry, moaning eyes – the kind of eyes I’m familiar with thanks to “one too many.” Despite the rough night we all had, all’s well that ends well, because today I’m free from having to entertain them. I'll be lucky if I can even wake them up to go out for their walk. A wonderful day, indeed… for me, anyway. For these two? I wish I could say, “they’ve learned their lesson.” But, hey, they’re dogs, and you’d better believe that if they had their druthers, they’d do it all over again.